Human beings are sexual beings. We live, we love, we have intimate relationships and many of us have children. Our spirits are nurtured by our loved ones and part of that relationship includes sex. However, many people’s lifestyles change when diagnosed or when a loved one becomes diagnosed with IBD. Fatigue, confidence or depression may present themselves in the diagnosed, which can have a dampening effect on self image and sexual desire.
Know that you are not alone, even if at times you feel as if you are the only person carrying around this burden. The way you are feeling is natural and quite honestly, is normal under the circumstances. But know this – whether it is you or someone you care about, IBD can be managed and so can its effect on sexual desire.
The Mind-Body Connection
- Psychoneuroimmunology, or PNI, is a fascinating branch of science that investigates the incredible relationship between our minds, our thoughts and our immune system. Increasingly, researchers and physicians are realizing that our thoughts and our emotions can play a significant role in our health.
- For someone with IBD, PNI might mean that the gut inflammation which is causing you so much physical distress may also elicit feelings of lethargy, apathy, and even depression. Alternatively, during times of emotional upheaval or stress, someone suffering from a flare-up of IBD may have an enhanced negative experience of their symptoms.
- On the flip side of PNI, positive thoughts generate positive feelings and studies have shown that in some cases, this can result in positive physiological events.
- PNI goes hand in hand with sex. Believe it or not, sex has health benefits and the tight-knit relationship between feeling good emotionally and feeling good physically has some real and tangible results.
Many people living with IBD do not want to have sex for various reasons. Some of these reasons include:
- The complications associated with IBD, such as nausea, vomiting and diarrhea
- Some people may develop fistulas which can cause pain during sex due to tearing, and their presence can be viewed as unpleasant or unclean
- Some patients may feel to fatigued or lethargic from malnutrition
- Medications, such as steroids or antibiotics, may have a dampening effect on sexual drive as well as sexual function
- Surgery may affect patients’ body images because of scars or the presence of an ostomy bag
- Emotions play an enormous role in how you perceive yourself and how you feel physically, as well as your capacity for arousal and desire. The most important thing to remember is sex does not start south of your neck; its starts in your head!
To read more about how IBD affects intimacy and relationships, check out our booklet “The Heart of the Matter.”
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